Of course, I knew one day it would happen. My quiet boring life would meet with the ghosts of my past. Namely, my college days would return and remind me of who I used to be.
Friends and students have heard me allude to my 'idiot college boyfriend.' He has not returned (and I'm not asking him to. Stay away Mikey, please.) But I have not talked about college in a very detailed way. It's much like the motto of FIGHT CLUB- the first rule of college theatre is 'don't talk about college theatre.' So I have rarely said much.
Now, as in yesterday, I joined a Facebook page for SRU theatre alumni. Oh, the stories! Oh, the memories!
What happened to the me who attended college? The girl who laughed with friends and had a boyfriend (boyfriend is a juvenile term when one is my age.) Where is the girl I used to be? Why and when did I get old? Is 48 really old?
And of course, this all comes back to changing my life. The small town near nothing and nowhere is ageing me. It has taken 15 years of my adulthood and left me with actual scars.
So goodbye to the grey hairs, the extra pounds, the non-life.
Thank you Miller Aud. (and it was odd) for reminding me that life is not a dress rehearsal. Time to live. (Don't worry. I'm not going to do something crazy like quit my job or hook up with a stranger. I am going to take control and make things happen.)